I made it to my first break during camp. Whew. But let me start more from my last post.

A guy came in to talk to us Saturday night, just to get us going for the week that was coming up, but he made some interesting points that really hit home for me.

• As Christians, we shouldn't be as concerned with the acts that we are doing as our relationship with God. God is all that matters and empty rituals can sometimes hinder us. This really hit me because I have already been thinking about how the Catholic Church has turned me into a mindless church goer. It isn't that I don't get anything out of it, but when every mass is exactly the same and it is just a bunch of rituals (many of which are really really old and have no significant meaning to me). Sure, I know what they symbolize, but are they going to bring me closer to God? No. And I don't think it is going to change after I see the ritual every week.
• In every situation that we go into, we should have nothing to gain, and nothing to lose. So if I screw up, I don't loose anything. If I do unbelievably well, I gain nothing. This could be applied to many different situations, but one that popped into my head was social situations where I try to impress people. While it is not something that I am heavily concerned about, it is still one of those things that is in the back of my head.
• Be yourself. Especially at a camp like this, it is so easy to just be fake for the kids and follow scripts, but don't! The kids like you as you are and they want to talk to you... not a script. But this also reminded me of my everyday life. I was particularly thinking of a situation that I was dealing with where someone was mad at me for basically being myself. I was sorry that they were mad at me, but I am who I am and I LOVE IT!

Ah yes. We got Sunday to just kind of kick it, and then we started on Monday. This week we have the oldest campers that we will ever have, and I only have two. I was thinking that this week would be a breeze to get through and then I could really start next week (when there might only be one other male counselor in my camp). I feel tired, but I am not even close to wanting it to end. These kids are so awesome, and I would not trade this job for any amount of money! I love this to death (especially when I find myself running through the woods being chased by 20 little campers who are coming from every direction while we play "Counselor Hunt").

I know that God is here when I am talking to the kids and they just all of a sudden say something that is amazingly deep that just blows me away. Yesterday we were praying in a group, and one of the campers said something that just blew me away. Then today, one of my campers who couldn't do the swim test yesterday because it was too cold got up the courage to do the test and passed! Yeah, I am going to love this summer.

I can't wait to see how much I change over this summer, because I know that these guys are having a much bigger impact on me than I am on them. They are great.

I miss you Amaris. I tried to call again but you were still gone. I will talk to you later though.